Dear Babies,

Today, I changed the way I pray for you.

I have always tried to pray very specific prayers for you. So in addition for praying that you would know Him and love Him, I have prayed that you would be healthy, that He would protect your purity, that He would give you friends, that you would love Him more than money, and for your future spouses that they would love Him. I have begged Him to rescue you. I have prayed that you would not be prosperous in your sins. I have prayed that He would protect you from the advances of the enemy. I have prayed that He would protect you from trauma. I have prayed that He would protect you from cancer and other diseases that run in our family. I have prayed that He would protect you from all of the sins in our family that we gift-wrap and hand down generation after generation. I have prayed that you would be safe and that when you died, you would be in Heaven.

And all of that is good. Those prayers are true and I still mean them.

But today, I woke up nauseated with the sin in this world, broken-hearted for the sick and dying, grieved for the lost, and fed-up with an enemy who seeks nothing else than to destroy the light, infiltrate the joyful with pain, and wage war against the Redeemer and those He has redeemed.

Most days I struggle with clinging too tightly to this world and not longing for Heaven. But not today. Today, I'm longing for our Savior's return. Today, I am empassioned for the lost. Today, I am charged up. Today, I'm ready to do battle. And I'm not going without you.

You see, it occurred to me somewhere in the middle of my rant of fury at the enemy and my pleas to the Lord for His return, What about my babies? How can I charge into battle without my babies? And the Lord's simple response to me was this: You Can't. 

And in those words suddenly it became clear to me that all of my prayers for you have been defensive. I have prayed that the Lord would defend YOU. That He would keep YOU safe. I have prayed, for the purpose of my own joy and comfort and for your comfort, that YOU would be in Heaven. And that is not all good. I can't let my words say that I pray and live for God's glory and then let my actions and prayers point to something else for someone else.

So, I've decided to change the way I pray. I'm still going to pray those things above for you, but I'm going to do it inside the battle plans the Lord has for HIM and for His Kingdom. And I'm going to start praying offensive prayers for you. Because I don't just want you to be safe and happy. I want you to raise up to be dangerous men and a dangerous woman for the Lord. I want you to be nauseated with sin, broken for the sick, and grieved for the lost. I want you to be fearless men and a fearless woman because fearless people are dangerous for the Lord. There is a battle going on around us and we can't huddle up comfortably in our little home, claiming to be fighting the battle and engaging with our commander when we aren't even there to hear his orders.

Babies, these prayers aren't the easy prayers. I know that what I am praying probably means that life isn't going to be easy. But here's the thing: it's not easy anyway. It's hard. And it hurts. And people are dying in this war without even knowing the hope and the joy that the victory has been won! And that's what we have to fight for.

So, my little warriors, it's time to suit up. Laura Kate, you see that breastplate of righteousness over there? Strap it on... we are going to need it. Hey Shepherd, why don't you pick up that sword of truth down there, chances are we are going to need it. Hey Fisch, you see that shield of faith? I know it's heavy but we are going to need that, why don't you bring it with us? Let's get our boots and helmets on and let's go.

The Lord is coming back, hopefully soon, but until He does, let's engage in this war with Him, because of Him and for Him. No turning back.

Love,
Mommy

[Check out this companion piece my dad wrote on the this topic]